My senior class performed the play “The Curious Savage.” To summarize, the children of Ethel P. Savage, an elderly heiress, attempt to commit her to an insane asylum (That’s what we called it back then, not the politically correct term for modern day, of course.) in order to take her fortune. In the play, I portrayed the asylum inmate Fairy May, a not so attractive girl who sees herself as beautiful.
The irony of that is not lost on me. In fact, at that time, I was an attractive girl who saw herself as ugly. While I was playing the part, the thought kept running through my head, “The audience thinks the director picked the perfect person for this role because I am so ugly.”
At the end of the play, Fairy May actually becomes beautiful. That part was horrendously embarrassing for me because I knew I couldn’t pull it off, and again, the thought ran through my head, “The audience thinks I’m still ugly.”
For those of you thinking, “She still looks like that picture sometimes when I see her in the grocery,” please don’t tell everybody that I sometimes (or often) leave the house looking like that.
Jill Richardson’s book Hobbits, You, and the Spiritual World of Middle Earth has a chapter entitled: So Ugly He Looks Like Me. When I read it, I knew I had to write about my senior play. This is a title a lot of middle and high school age kids can relate to, whether they feel ugly on the inside or outside or both.
Can you guess which character of Middle Earth is this chapter’s focus? ( Spoiler Alert: answer below. Don’t read by the ** if you don’t want to know.) In the chapter, Jill talks about the redeeming grace and love of Christ and about the fact that He will never give up on us. In a world where worth is associated with looks and power, the unconditional love of a powerful God is a wonderful message.
My pastor spoke about this same topic in his sermon last Sunday. Hosea, the prophet, married Gomer, a prostitute, because God told him to marry her. When Gomer left Hosea to return to her life of prostitution, God sent him after her to bring her back to symbolize how much God loves us in spite of all the ugly inside of us.
I tend to be an idealist, so as I am reading each chapter of the book, I am thinking of the “What About You?” questions at the end as “What About Me?.”
So, what about me?
1. Q. * “If there was an account of all of my sins and unfaithfulness written somewhere, would I like to look at it?” A. No. No matter how ugly I thought I looked on the outside, it would be nothing compared to the ugliness of that list.
That list of sins cannot be made magically beautiful like Fairy May at the end of the play. It can, however, be wiped clean by Jesus’ sacrifice on the cross.
It took a long time for me to stop thinking of myself as anything but a troll. Now, whether I go out looking like the picture above, or the picture on the “About Me” page, I don’t really think about how I look on the outside. I am very glad, however, that I am beautiful on the inside because the LORD Jesus never gave up on me.
* From: Hobbits, You, and the Spiritual World of Middle-Earth by Jill Richardson, Lighthouse Publishing of the Carolinas, 2013, Page 20.Visit her blog at:http://jill-theimperfectjourney.blogspot.com/
Her book is available on Amazon.
** Spoiler: The character is Gollum.